SIDE 1

WALTER

You have to work on Christmas Eve, tough luck, so do I. Get it through your heads, Greenway s on his way and if he doesn t buy our pitch, we re all fired.

DEB

May I make a suggestion?

WALTER

Anything.

DEB

Whenever we visited my grammy in Budapest, she would tell us the story of little Palko, the one-legged boy. He wished and he wished every year for a leg and then one Christmas morning there it was, under the tree. From Santa.

WALTER

A leg?

DEB

Yes. A leg.

WALTER

A human leg?

DEB

Yes, because he d been a very good boy.

WALTER

That s the most disgusting story I ve ever heard.

DEB

Well, it s incredibly touching when you hear it in Hungarian.

SIDE 2

CHADWICK

Little tomato people. They are busily preparing for Christmas, but little do they know, the mean tomato who lives on top of the mountain is planning to steal Christmas this year.

WALTER

You are describing the Grinch.

CHADWICK

But with tomatoes!

WALTER

Greenway is going to fire us all if we don t come up with something good, you understand that?

(MATTHEWS bursts in, carrying a small manuscript.)

MATTHEWS

I got it! You are familiar, of course, with Christopher Smith.

WALTER

Are you kidding? Christopher Smith was the greatest writer of Christmas stories who ever lived.

MATTHEWS

Mr. Hobbs, I met this guy who recently acquired a desk once owned by one Christopher Smith and in a secret drawer he finds a manuscript.

WALTER

A lost Chris Smith Christmas story?

MATTHEWS

A lost Chris Smith Christmas story!

(MATTHEWS hands WALTER a small, yellowing manuscript.)

MATTHEWS

Be careful. It s the only copy.

(Suddenly, BUDDY, in his business suit, bursts into the conference room, having just come from his date.)

BUDDY

I m in love! And I don t care who knows it!

WALTER

Buddy, please. We re very busy.

BUDDY

Dad, I need a table for two at Tavern on the Green, seven o clock, Christmas Eve. And four hundred dollars.

MATTHEWS

The guy s waiting in the lobby, Mr. Hobbs.

WALTER

(to BUDDY)

Buddy. We ll talk about this in a minute. Just, do me a favor and sit there in that chair. Amuse yourself.

BUDDY

Oh, okay, Dad.

WALTER

(to MATTHEWS)

Well, bring the guy up here. I want to thank him personally.

MATTHEWS

He s not waiting for a thank you. He s waiting for $300,000.

(WALTER puts down the manuscript.)

WALTER

What?

CHADWICK

Mr. Hobbs, we ve been trying to come up with an idea for a story but we got nothing.

MATTHEWS

We re idiots!

CHADWICK

And then this comes along: It s a gift from God!

MATTHEWS

And God gets mad when you don t accept his gifts.

WALTER

Fine. I ll write the guy a check.

SIDE 3

DEB

Mr. Greenway, sir.

BUDDY

(standing up)

Hi, Mr. Greenway, I m Buddy the Elf!

MR. GREENWAY

What? Who the devil is that?

WALTER

Well, he s, uh, he s my, son.

MR. GREENWAY

What?!


WALTER

Deb! Buddy needs a break.

DEB

(to BUDDY)

Buddy, why don t you come help me put these documents through the shredder?

BUDDY

What s a shredder?


DEB

It s a machine that makes snow.

BUDDY

No way!

(BUDDY and DEB leave the office.)

MR. GREENWAY

Hobbs! My phone has been ringing off the hook. Angry mothers, kids crying,  What happened to Jingles, the jolly Christmas puppy?

WALTER

It was an unfortunate oversight, Mr

MR. GREENWAY

Hobbs, you re out of a job unless you can come up with a blockbuster idea for a new Christmas book. I mean a through- the-roof national bestseller!

WALTER

Well, sir, that s easier said than done

MR. GREENWAY

Yes, it is. So you better get your top writers on it, because I will be back in New York on the evening of December twenty- fourth. At that time, you will present to me, in exact detail, your plans for the book! Happy holidays, Hobbs.